Life is Short

Life is Short!!
Life is ShortSorry. Life is not short, it's just that everything else lasts so long-mountains, rivers, stars, planets - life seems short. Actually life lastsjust the right amount of time. Until you die. Death on the other hand....isvery, very short.

Nice Guys Finish Last.
Not true. Studies have shown that, on average, nice guys finish third in a field of six. Actually, short guys finish last. By the way, in medieval times it was widely believed that nice guys finished twenty-sixth. You can see how limited those people were.

Two Wrongs Don't Make a Right.
Well, it just so happens that two wrongs do make a right. Not only that, but as the number of wrongs increases, the whole thing goes up exponentially. So that while two wrongs make one right, and four wrongs make two rights, it actually takes sixteen wrongs to make three rights, and 256 wrongs to make four rights. It seems to me that anyone who is stringing together 256 wrongs needs counseling, not mathematics.

Everything Comes in Threes.
Not true. In reality, everything comes in ones. Sometimes, when three "ones come in a row, it seems like everything comes in threes. By the way, in medieval times it was widely believed that everything came in twenty-sixes. They were wrong, too. It just took them longer to recognize the pattern.

You Can't Take It With You (When you die)
Well....., that depends on what it is. If it's your dark blue suit, you cancertainly take it with you. In fact, not only can you take it with you, you can probably put some things in your pockets.

You Learn Something New Every Day.
Actually, you learn something old every day. Just because you've just learned it doesn't mean it's new. Other people already knew it, Columbus is a good example of this.

The Sky's The Limit
Well, how can the sky be the limit? The sky never ends. What kind of a limit is that? The earth is the limit. You dig a hole and what do you keep getting? More earth. The earth is the limit.